After taking some time last week to land quietly in the Netherlands (not an unqualified success), this week the hard work began: three lectures, three shoots, and a radio appearance. In the meantime, I put the finishing touches on my new book, for which I received two proof copies, and ate pizza with my family for my father’s birthday. And somewhere in between, I even found time to drop off a few Vinted packages.
Monday started relatively quietly with an online lecture for government trainees. Because I’m usually a mix of tired and hyped after a talk, I decided to take the tram to Rataplan and Amazing Oriental in Ypenburg. I bought a dress and some camisoles, and then ate a plate of rendang.
Tuesday was shoot day. Together with Charlotte, I welcomed three women to Maan’s studio for a photoshoot. It turned into a very fun but busy day, which we ended with a mirror selfie. Because yes, those tiles… We had to take a photo with them!
On Wednesday I quickly put the finishing touches on that evening’s presentation. After that, I set off for Duivendrecht – where I gave a lecture for Levvel’s parent association – with a small suitcase full of books.
On the train to my lecture I was texting François. I complained about how long the journey was, that I would have to travel back to The Hague that evening, only to go the opposite direction again the next morning – this time to the radio studio in Hilversum, where I had been invited to talk about a late autism diagnosis. “Too bad they don’t really have those business hotels here like in Japan…”
But wait, is that actually true? I decided to check Booking.com and found the Bastion Hotel in Bussum Zuid. Right next to the station. One stop from the Media Park and only half an hour from Duivendrecht. 92 euros.
I didn’t have to think long. Luckily I always carry half my life with me, including underwear, a toothbrush and charging cables, so I didn’t have to go back to The Hague at all. Instead of travelling two hours through the morning rush and arriving completely overstimulated, I could wake up calmly, take a shower, grab Starbucks in Hilversum, and then stroll into the studio.
In the radio studio I met Maaike Helmer. She wrote the book Daar is een woord voor, about her late diagnosis, which had been released that day. While I was still in Japan I had already spoken to Maaike over Zoom, and I sometimes help her with her website. But this was the first time we met in person, and it was really fun! (You can listen back to our radio segment here, by the way.)
I was starting to get pretty tired, but the day wasn’t over yet. My father’s birthday dinner was that evening. In The Hague, luckily. I decided to go pick up my new glasses, check out a thrift store in the city, and then wait in a café until it was time. At the café I called François. Because I didn’t want anyone to overhear me, we spoke in Japanese. Benri!
Friday was a relatively quiet day. I dropped off some packages, prepared my lecture, and cooked an old recipe: curry – or what I call a “throw-everything-in-the-pan” dish. Just a little calm before the storm.
On Saturday I had my next lecture. This time in Apeldoorn, for an audience of 126 people. I would be selling books here as well, but with a crowd this size a rolling suitcase wasn’t enough. I taped up my battered SuitSuit suitcase one last time, hoping the wheels would hold out for one more day. (Luckily, they did.)
Earlier I had asked my friend Eline if she wanted to come along, and thankfully she came by car. She picked me up from Apeldoorn station – which saved me about fifteen minutes of dragging luggage. Eline turned out to be a fantastic all-round assistant; besides driving, she was also excellent at pressing the button for the next slide, and she took photos for the people who wanted a picture with me.
On Saturday I had my next lecture. This time in Apeldoorn, for an audience of 126 people. I would be selling books here as well, but with a crowd this size a rolling suitcase wasn’t enough. I taped up my battered SuitSuit suitcase one last time, hoping the wheels would hold out for one more day. (Luckily, they did.)
Earlier I had asked my friend Eline if she wanted to come along, and thankfully she came by car. She picked me up from Apeldoorn station – which saved me about fifteen minutes of dragging luggage. Eline turned out to be a fantastic all-round assistant; besides driving, she was also excellent at pressing the button for the next slide, and she took photos for the people who wanted a picture with me.
On Saturday I had my next lecture. This time in Apeldoorn, for an audience of 126 people. I would be selling books here as well, but with a crowd this size a small suitcase wasn’t enough. I taped up my battered SuitSuit suitcase one last time, hoping the wheels would hold out for one more day. (Luckily, they did.)
Earlier I had asked my friend Eline if she wanted to come along, and thankfully she came by car. She picked me up from Apeldoorn station – which saved me about fifteen minutes of dragging luggage. Eline turned out to be a fantastic all-round assistant; besides driving, she was also excellent at pressing the button for the next slide, and she took photos for the people who wanted a picture with me.
Something special happened during the signing, by the way. A girl came up to me and said, “I want to thank you. Because of your book, I felt human for the first time – instead of a robot.” I flipped through the book I was about to sign; I always like to peek at which printing someone has. She had the first one. And where I normally stay pretty composed in these moments, suddenly tears filled my eyes. For a full minute I couldn’t say anything at all. I just cried.
I still don’t quite know why seeing that 1 did it. “When you write, you’re basically writing to nobody,” I tried to explain. You don’t know who will read it. You don’t see it happen. It’s just words on a screen, and then on paper. Of course I’ve received feedback from people many times before – by email, in my DMs, and also at lectures. And while I’ve always been grateful and I definitely heard it, it often still felt a bit abstract. Maybe I was also deliberately keeping a bit of a wall up. Maybe it was the exhaustion, the busy week, that suddenly allowed this girl to break through it. Either way, it was special.
Afterwards, Eline and I had a drink at Starbucks, after which I got back on the train for another two hours. The Holland Zingt Hazes crowd luckily got off at Amsterdam Bijlmer Arena, and after that I could finally relax a bit. Today I did the laundry and sent off a few final book corrections. Next week will be relatively calm. Breathe in, breathe out.
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